In memory of Ling

In Memory of Feng Ling

10/9/2011

 

Two years ago, 10/5/2009, a very tragic and sad day, Ling, you suddenly left us forever. Last Sunday (10/2/2011), in memory of you, my husband and I drove to visit your cemetery.

 

It’s a sunny lovely Sunday morning. The graveyard was quiet and warm. I placed the flower gently down, standing in front of you, tears still slid down my cheeks…Maybe you haven’t left us ? I know you’re in Heaven now, I wish, I really wish I could believe what you had believed.

 

I have been complained a lot recently, about my work stress, my family work balance. For the past few weeks, due to a special project, I had to put lots of overtime at work, as a wife and mother, 60 hours a week for work was a bit too much for me.  I had to call in sick last Tuesday, I was down, no emails, no phone calls, no family chores, not even step out my house once…I simply didn’t want to do anything…

 

I thought about you, I felt embarrassed, I should feel fortunate enough to live, to have a job, to have a job needed by others. Why should I complain so much? On the other hand, I felt puzzled,  our final final destiny would be the same,  sooner or later, why shouldn’t we have a happy journey? Or maybe it’s our choice to be happy OR not happy?

 

Are you happy OR not happy? 

 

Feng Ling
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